Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Quiet--and Not-So-Quiet--Desperation

In Walden, Thoreau wrote that "the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation."  When I worked for the state, there were a couple of women in my office whose very existence proved a refutation to that statement: they led lives of decidedly noisy desperation.  Everyone knew when things went wrong with these ladies' lives.  And things were always going wrong with their lives.
 
I remember thinking, the first time I read that particular quote, how profoundly sad it made me.  I read Walden for the first time after finishing my freshman year of college.  And it had been a hard year to date.  A year where I had felt as though I were leading a life of quiet desperation, despite having a few confidants who knew about my struggles from January to April 2003.  Indeed, my blog post of a few days ago was quite the anomaly for me.  I'm the sort of person who tends to internalize and then reach a point where some form of expression becomes inevitable.
 
As a matter of fact, I tend to internalize to such a point that when the expression becomes necessary, the Katie runneth over.  So to speak.  You know what I mean.
 
And let me be frank: I prefer quiet desperation to noisy desperation.  Or quiet desperation infrequently expressed to select people.  Noisy desperation never seems as serious to me.  It seems more like a plea for attention than anything else; it's one thing to wear emotions, it's quite another to broadcast them to anyone within hearing range.
 
If Thoreau's statement is correct, I think it's because people become passive.  They let themselves be acted upon and they choose not act; they accept their circumstances in spite of discontent.  Their winter of discontent turns into a spring of discontent.  And then into a summer and fall of their discontent.
 
It's so easy to recognize this.  Why is it so hard to not fall into that trap?

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